MartinMoonfang42 t1_j9wpumc wrote

"So why am I stuck reviving Magnus again?" asked Cynthia as she started pouring magic into the broken corpse that used to be their party member.

"Because," replied Prince Erik fon Valmark, "Magnus is a valuable member of this party and we should treat him the same respect he does to us." That made Cynthia stop her magic,

"Oh," she said, "Like he treated me with respect when he told me I should 'go back to the nunnery and leave the work to the menfolk'?" She brandished her mace just under his nose. Erik had personally seen the weapon turn men, monsters and even a couple demons into a fine paste.

"Or," said Arynia, their archer, "when he told me I should go back to the forest and play with flowers?". The elven woman was the most terrifying hunter the prince had ever met, as well as his friend Alex the Hero's fiance, "or when he told Emmet that magic was for 'pussies' and he should pick up a sword and fight like a 'real man'?"

Erik facepalmed,

"Okay," he said, "Magnus is an asshole, he's still been my friend since childhood."

Meanwhile, on the other side of the cavern, Emmet the wizard and Alex the Hero were trying to calm down a dragon.

"I'msorryI'msorryI'msorry!" she cried.

Emmet was using a pair of giant spectral hands to rub the dragon's shoulders,

"Easy now," he said calmly, "slow deep breaths."

"In through the nose," Alex told her, "count to four, out through the mouth."

The dragon closed her eyes, breathed as instructed and it did calm her down,

"Thank you," she said, "I'm terribly sorry about that. Your friend just...charged right at me screaming bloody murder."

"Yeah," said Emmet, "he did that a lot."

"He did it to me the very first time we met," said Alex, "he wasn't exactly the smartest."

"Yeah," said Emmet, "not the first time he's run in and gotten killed either. Remember last year at the 'tea party'?"

Alex groaned, "why'd you have to go and remind me of that?"

"Because it was hilarious," said Emmet.

"For you maybe," said Alex, "you weren't the one getting shot at!"

"Shield spell and Greater Invisibility," said Emmet, "Name me a better spell combination."

Alex shook his head,

"Are you all right now Lady Kalithirax?" he asked the dragon.

"Yes," she replied, resting her silver scaled head on the floor, "Again, I'm terribly sorry. Bu if you don't mind my asking why do you keep someone like that in your party? It sound like he caused nothing but problems."

"Because he's Erik's best friend," replied Alex, "he has something of a blind spot when it comes to Magnus."

It was true, every time Magnus had gone charging in, sword held high, screaming his head off, Erik had looked the other way during the inevitable aftermath. Every pointless battle, tavern brawl and today's suicidal charge. The man only seemed to know only one tactic: run straight at his opponent, sword in hand. Alex had told him more than once it would get him killed, and today it got him back handed into a wall by a dragon. A dragon the party had specifically sought as an ally against the Dark Emperor.

"We must apologize Lady Kalithirax," said Emmet, "We told him we were here to seek your aid. Multiple times."

It was at this moment that Erik walked over to the pair,

"Except that wasn't what Magnus wanted to do," he said, "I actually asked me why we were 'taming a beast instead of killing it'. Honestly I'm starting to wonder why I let him join us."

"Because he was our heaviest hitter," said Alex, "If we needed something cleaved in half he was the guy to do it. Though I doubt even he'd be able to do anything with that." He pointed to where Magnus's enormous greatsword had fallen, or rather what was left of it. The blade had been shattered like glass and fragments of it littered the floor of the cavern.

"Yeah," said Emmet, "it was the one thing he was actually good at."

Erik facepalmed again,

"I get it," he said with a groan, "my best friend was an asshole. And to be honest we are probably better off without him."

"So," said Cynthia, "does that mean I don't have to bring him back again?"

"No," said Alex, "and I also have something I want to try."

As the assembled party watched quizzically, Alex leaned in close to Lady Kalithirax and whispered something into her ear.

"Why yes," she said, "I absolutely can do that."

In a great flash of magic the dragon vanished, and was replaced with the most beautiful woman that Prince Erik had ever seen. She was tall, with long silver hair and the most intense cerulean eyes. She would have been mistaken for an elf if not for the draconic horns atop her head.

"Is this suitable?" asked Lady Kalithirax. Alex nodded,

"I'd say that's perfect," he said.

And that was how a dragon became an adventurer.